The 'last-name-that-either-exults-you-or-ridicules-you' Syndrome

Greek people must be the only race that I have personally come across whose last names have etymological roots that when spoken, give off a comical flavor to them. For instance, yesterday I had a guy whose last name was 'power saw' or 'prioni' in Greek - you know, the kind you use to cut down a tree. Or, better yet, there was a woman I met last week whose surname was 'Κουκουρουκου.' I'm guessing she must have had someone in her family who had a loose screw in their minds, and it must have been carried on from generation to generation until she got stuck with it - how embarrassing it is to be her. Below is a list of last names -followed by my own critique- that I've heard other people tell me about. If you have a funny one to add the the list, then please, be my guest. There are a few that have 'no comment' next to them, so you can also add something there as well.
ΜΑΛΙΑΚΑΣ/Μαλάκα - I've heard both mentioned; imagine being named after an insult - how tragic!
καρπουζης - He must really be a sweet, red(complexion) watery kinda guy...lol
κωλάρας - His cheeks must have profound meaning...
κουνελάκη - no comment.
Τσιμπούκη - no comment.
Πουλής - no comment.
Χούφτας - I can't imagine this surname belonging to a female; I'm sure that if a guy had it, he'd feel proud of himself in a perverted kinda way..
Τριχας - Either he/she has a hair fetish, or they must really be hairy...
Σάλτσας - I guess he/she likes to spice things up...maybe a touch of Tabasco should do the trick..
Πιπας - no comment.
κόπανος - no comment.
Λυπημένος - Their family tree must have had a legacy of sad experiences.
Καραγκιόζης - no comment.
Μπούρδας - no comment.
Τούβλος - I think this person is a few bricks short of a load.
Πικραμενος - This miserable person must be bitter about life. Oh well, get over it and try changing your name to something more pleasant sounding.
Πάπαρας - no comment.

Whatever their family legacy was...it must have surely been marred by some misfortunate event because these names don't just come out by chance. A word of advice to all those who posses these kinds of names: "go to a lawyer and get your surname changed. It's not as hard as you think. Don't let your succeeding generations suffer from humiliating insults just because you felt you had to carry on or honor your family's tradition."